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Posts tagged ‘desert wedding’

Do you value custom ceremony?

You are likely reading this because a) either you already do, or b) you’re not quite sure and find yourself googling for information to make a decision. My answer: yes. Yes, I do. I value custom ceremony experiences beyond words and devote my practice to bringing these into existence. (As usual, I find myself employing words for wordless experiences!) Yet I don’t hope to stand on a soap box. I’m sharing my core values to ultimately support you in finding your way into a meaningful, uplifting and connecting experience.

And so here I am as a Life-Cycle Celebrant® in Tucson, sharing the what and why behind my core values for Sweetgrass Ceremonies: 

Core values

Core values (Photo credit: HowardLake)


1) Expand a sense of connection

All with a sense of ease and joy between people, animal companions and place. I love to support and expand relationships amongst you, your family members and your guests, your animal friends and the special places you gather for celebration. So often the couples and families I serve have a connection to each other and the place where the wedding occurs at the center of their priorities for the event. Our work together expands and deepens this connection.

2) Co-create meaningful experiences

Through crafting, guiding and leading custom ceremonies based on YOUR stories, beliefs and values. I am committed to hearing what is important to you and then holding up a mirror, so you see these things reflected back to you in your ceremony. I infuse the universal meaning or symbolism into the personal symbols, stories or exchanges – so everyone present can tap into the meaning.

3) Offer relevant and fun ceremony elements

Ceremonies come to life through a feeling of timeless, relevant and uplifting moments. With my whole heart, I believe we open ourselves to living these moments when we lean into both the joy and the work of life or the happiness and the sorrow. I believe there is space for belly laughter and gentle tears, all during the same ceremony. Together we find expressive and fun elements to express what is true for you, wherever you find yourself in life.

4) Surpass ideas of what is possible

I actively listen to help you suss out what you want to experience and then present alternatives for both meeting and exceeding your visions. This is born out of collaboration. I love to hear your seed ideas and form collaborative unity rituals, for example, that nobody at your ceremony has ever seen before.

5) Be calm, open-minded and confident

The day of an event can be full of anticipation and even sometimes, full-on anxiety. I always arrive on the day-of feeling rested, calmly present (well in advance of ‘go-time’) and ready for whatever lies ahead with an open mind. I take this work very seriously – it is my livelihood! I am professional in every way: from how I speak to how I guide people while lining up and how I dress to the way I  wear my hair. I strongly value helping you feel calm, comfortable and confident, so naturally, it helps if I am too!


P.S. Custom and co-created experiences open us up to a fun world of what is possible. As a Western culture, we do have some reliably staid norms around big events like weddings or funerals. As a result, people might close the door on holding the event at all, due to either having experienced the same generic sequence of events over and over, or feeling intimidated by entering an awkward fray of blending beliefs or culture in a contemporary and dynamic world.

To this sentiment I say: “Be Fearless!” Open the door to what is possible during a custom ceremony. Take a leap and value the work of co-creating a custom ceremony. Find yourself a Life-Cycle Celebrant® to help guide your efforts. Write or call me to begin the conversation! I have faith you’ll be happy you did.

A Persian Wedding in the Sonoran Desert

In April, I witnessed a family’s Persian wedding customs . . . immediately following the American style wedding I co-created with the Bride and Groom. We celebrated with these two ceremonies at the scenic Quail Creek Country Club in Green Valley, Arizona. Being the ceremony enthusiast I am, you might guess I was pretty over the moon about this! And you are correct.

First I must plainly say wow! There is some raise-the-roof NOISE generated by folks during the Persian ceremony and I LOVED IT. I want to figure out more alternatives to couples for bringing their guests the chance to get on their feet and enjoy themselves with their whole beings.


I’ll set my enthusiasm into some context with this statement: I think guest participation is VITAL to an uplifting ceremony experience. (I’ll try not to digress, though.)

The music, the singing and chanting, the clapping, the wedding party entrance with sheer exuberance . . . if that’s not enough then get ready for the symbolism. There is a whole array to feast upon. I got a tour of the altar from the Bride’s Mom, who assembled it with love. She positively beamed in her floor length sparkling dress as she explained everything to me. I’ll attempt a recap in a very brief way here.

As you can see in the photo, the Bride and Groom sit facing the altar and all the goodies upon it during the ceremony. The important women relatives and bridal party rub together fabric covered sugar cones and sprinkle this on the couple’s heads, to bring them sweetness and happiness.

The couple faces into a large mirror so they can see how well they are surrounded with love and enjoy the images of light reflected by the candles, to symbolically light their way into the future. Once the Bride removes her veil, this image is ritually ‘the first time the Groom sees his Bride’. Obviously, there exists deeper symbolism than I can begin to fully explain. Here are a few highlights:


Fertility: Represented in the bejeweled eggs, golden walnuts and greens.

Joyous Future: Represented by the apples, the connection to Divine.

Wealth: Represented by the jewels.

Sustenance: Represented by the flat bread and the milk.

Lighting way into Future: Represented in the candlelight, near the mirror.

Sweetness in Life: Although you can’t see it here, there was a glass vessel full of honey, into which the Bride and Groom both dipped their pinky fingers and put into each other’s mouths. (This caused a big joyous uproar amongst the guests!)


My favorite part of this whole experience happened when the man who led this portion of the ceremony came up to me SO excitedly after the ‘American’ ceremony and before the part he led and said, “I totally enjoyed your ceremony. You said everything I will say in Farsi during this version of a wedding. You see? It is all the same, isn’t? For it is only about LOVE!”

Thank you, Kevin and Nassim. I loved being a part of your very special celebration.